A man was the lone driver on the road — which was good for others drivers but not so good for him. It turns out he had been drinking at a holiday party and could not keep his car in his lane. In fact a nearby police officer watched him almost run right into a raised median. He pulled the driver over and asked if he had been drinking. He said he had some eggnog earlier. The officer, as if he had to ask, wondered if there was any alcohol in the eggnog and the man admitted that there was.
The officer then asked why the man almost hit the median and the driver’s response was that he had not been through that intersection in some time.
At this point the officer asked him to step out of his vehicle and perform some tests. The man walked slowly and deliberately and they began.
Once they got to the instruction stage the man was asked to stand still. However he could hardly keep his balance and told the officer (note: before he even began the test) that he could not do this sober.
He must not have been sober because he could not do the tests either. At one point he told the officer “I can’t do this when I’m sober, my equilibrium is off.”
He left no room for question and was taken to jail for DUI.