Sometimes a lie just sounds better

  • Tuesday, April 23, 2013

An officer was behind a pick up truck that kept swerving in and out of its lane and, at one point, drove half way into the oncoming lane. according to the police report.

The vehicle turned into a neighborhood and drove down the middle of the street before the officer finally pulled the driver over.

The driver was smoking a cigarette when the officer approached him, the report said.

But the smoke did not cover up the smell of booze. The officer asked him for his license, registration and insurance - the usual.

The driver then handed over his license and asked the officer what he needed.

Then he asked the officer what he had given him so far. The officer asked the driver if he had been drinking, and he replied that he had a couple of beers.

He was asked to step out of his vehicle, and the driver asked the officer if the officer could just follow him home since he lived right around the corner.

When he got no response the driver walked to the rear of his truck, falling slightly into it.

Before they began field sobriety tests he was asked again about drinking and this time he said he had five beers at a concert that night.

He was asked if he had any physical impairments and he said he had bad knees but could walk and stand on one leg just fine.

He also said he had a college education and knew his alphabet.

But according to the police report, when asked to recite the alphabet from D to R, he said E, E, F, G, H, R, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U.

Then he said, “What was I supposed to do again?”

The officer explained the instructions a second time and this time he said, “D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, aaahhh, J, K, (pause), L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, there is an I in there somewhere.”

And the one leg stand didn’t go so well either, according to the report. He said he could not stand there because he was not feeling good.

He was eventually arrested for DUI. He blew a .10 percent and was taken to the jail.

On the way there he said he did not even have any beer at the concert. Instead he stated he drank a double scotch and a double vodka.

The officer asked him why he lied and he said, “Telling you that I had a couple of beers sounded better than telling you I had four shots of liquor.”

Crazy dog lady


A woman living in an apartment complex often walks her three dogs without a leash. They roam free and become aggressive when they pass other dogs locked up on their back porches or in their own fenced-in yards.

Another tenant of the complex has witnessed this behavior many times.

Most recently, this witness watched the woman kneel down in front of her fence, feed her dog something and keep going. Not 24 hours later, the dog became very sick and refused to eat.

The vet was not able to treat the dog due to the witness not being able to cover the costs.

The witness then healed her dog with a home remedy, but called police because she felt certain the crazy dog lady fed her dog something poisonous.

There was no way to prove this, but officers did go to the woman’s house and warn her not to let her dogs run free and to stay away from other dogs.

Worth it?

Two high school kids got busted by in-school surveillance cameras for stealing.

They must have been starving because it was reported they stole $4 worth of items out of a vending machine.

One would act as the look out and one would lie down on the ground and squirm his skinny arm up and over the stop bar to grab items out of the machine, according to the report.

They stole things like a poptart or rice krispy treat.

The boys admitted to wrongdoing and were punished by the school administration.

The vending machine company chose not to press charges, but did want to be reimbursed.

Both kids’ parents agreed to pay back $2 each.

Yea right


A 33-year-old local man called police in reference to his car being stolen.

He said he last saw his car on a Saturday night and that Monday morning he noticed his car was missing from his usual parking spot.

He said his golf clubs were still in his trunk.

Police began their investigation and learned the car had been towed by a local tow service Monday. The call for service came in from the manager of a local bank.

The police brought in a crime scene tech to inventory the car.

The golf clubs were still in the trunk.

An employee of the tow company overheard police doing their investigation and offered up some information.

He said a car had hit a fast food restaurant sign on Saturday night and car parts were all over the roadway.

Police collected those car parts which were of similar make and model of the allegedly stolen car.

The case remains active until police can review the tape from the bank and the fast food restaurant to determine who the driver was.

Imaginary friend


A gas station clerk called police after a man fell asleep at the wheel of his car in front of one of her pumps.

Police arrived and asked the man what he was doing. He said he was sleepy and not driving.

He said his friend went to the restroom but never returned.

The driver appeared to be unsteady on his feet, according to the report, and not aware of what was going on around him.

He completed a series of field sobriety tests successfully and said he had not been drinking alcohol or doing drugs.

Several minutes went by and the driver’s “friend” never reappeared.

He maintained his story that he never drove the car.

But the gas station clerk pulled the video that clearly shows the suspect driving into the gas station parking lot, circling around the pumps and then parking.

No one was in the car with him, according to the report.

It turns out his license is suspended.

This was his second citation for driving under suspension.

How original


A high school student stayed late after school for an extra-curricular activity.

When she walked out to her car, parked in the school parking lot, she saw that her car had been vandalized. Someone had keyed a vulgar cuss word into her paint job. She called police and showed them what happened.

When asked if she had any idea who would do this to her, she immediately spouted off the name of a girl she had been having issues with.

No one saw the incident take place, but school officials said they would pull the surveillance tape to see if they could ID anyone.


The Police Blotter is intended to be an informative and/or humorous column written from police reports obtained from the Mount Pleasant Police Department. Many of the stories come from the initial incident reports and, occasionally, supplemental reports. Generally, cases have not been adjudicated at the time of publication. See more columns at www.moultrienews.com.

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