‘Cherrio’ to beloved mother and grandmother

  • Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Diana Hoffman Grieg

A personal note: A special thank you to all those who offered comfort following the passing of my mother, Diana Hoffman Grieg, for the love, support, notes, donations to her cause, comforting food and prayers. I am comforted through my faith that she is finally reunited with her forever love, my dad, Donald David Grieg. I was so blessed to have both of my parents for their 92 years (each) and that our family, and all who knew them, is left a legacy of love for all people and respect for all cultures, generosity, honor, fidelity, great humor, love of learning, love of the water, the arts - music, theatre, ballet and passion for animals. They were fixtures on Isle of Palms for many years.

My mother had two daughters: my sister (Emilie Grieg Wolitzer) and me. My mom, of course, adored her four grandchildren and six great-grandchildren and was so very proud of their unique gifts and their potential to give to the world.

Her “Celebration of Life” included the talents of the amazing Plantation Singers, vocalist Laura Aycock and pianist, David Taylor; My son, David Brisacher, lovingly cracked us up with his comments. I am deeply grateful our families could come together in such a way, that my mother and parents, would greatly appreciate. Never needing a “good-bye” my mom would say with a wave, “Cheerio!”

So, mom, to honor you, back to work with a serious topic:

Dear Liz,

I just learned that my husband had been taking some of our daughter’s Ritalin in addition to his own (properly prescribed) ADD medicine. He is other-wise responsible, a great loving parent. He has one doctor prescribing his medicines, and always uses one pharmacy. There is no alcohol abuse. So, I am looking at the bright side, but need to know how I can best help him. I’m shocked and a little scared.

What to do?

Dear “…to do?”

I am so sorry you have to deal with this news and the resulting worries. You didn’t say how you learned. My hope is, that he would be able to admit to you there is a problem. But in most substance abuse situations, denial and fear of consequences loom large.

I would start by going with him to his psychiatrist and ask for help there. The prescribing MD should be the 1st line of defense. You cannot be his therapist. While in the company of a licensed professional, ask how you can best help. You’ve heard of the word, “enabling,” that is (out of love) doing things that actually make it easier for the abuser to continue his or her behavior. It is part of the addictive process. Read up on co-dependency. Ritalin is a commonly abused substance. It is also sold illegally on the street.

Taking your daughter’s medicine is in the realm of illegal, dangerous and also risky for her. Make sure she is on her proper dose, and keep her medicines locked up for now.

Contact Liz via asksharpliz@gmail.com.

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